ARE YOU PREGNANT AND THINKING ABOUT ADOPTION?

If you are pregnant and not sure that you want to keep the baby, you might be
thinking about adoption. Pregnancy causes many changes, both physical and
emotional. It can be a very confusing time for a woman, even in the best of
circumstances. Talking to a counselor about your options might help.

The decision to place a child for adoption is a difficult one. It is an act of
great courage and much love. But adoption is permanent. The adoptive parents
will raise your child and have legal authority for his or her welfare. You need
to think about these questions as you make your decision.

1. Have I explored all possibilities?

Pregnancy can affect your feelings and emotions. Are you only thinking about
adoption because you have money problems, or because your living situation is
difficult: These problems might be temporary. Have you called Social Services to
see what they can do, or asked friends and family if they can help? If you have
done these things and still want adoption, you will feel more content with your
decision.

2. Will the adoptive parents take good care of my child?

Prospective adoptive parents are carefully screened and give a great deal of
information about themselves. They are visited in their home several times by a
social worker and must provide personal references. They are taught about the
special nature of adoptive parenting before an adoption takes place. By the time
an Agency has approved adoptive parents for placement, they have gotten to know them very well, and feel confident they would make good parents. This does not promise that they will be perfect parents, but decent people who really want to care for children.

3. Will my child wonder why I placed him/her for adoption?

Probably. But adoption in the new millenium is probably a lot different from what it was when you were growing up. Most adopted adults realize that their birth parents placed them for adoption out of love and because it was the best they knew how to do. Hopefully your child will come to realize that a lot of his/her wonderful traits come from you.

4. Why am I placing my child for adoption?

If your answer is because it is what you, or you and your partner think is best,
then it is a good decision. Now it is time to move forward and not feel guilty.
No matter where you go for counseling, a counselor should always treat you with
respect and make you feel good about yourself! An adoption agency is a good choice for services if you are leaning strongly in the direction of adoption.

Talk with the counselor about the type of adoption that is best for you. Do you
want to decide who adopts your child? Would you mind if a single person adopted
your child? A couple of a different race? Would you be willing to share social
and medical background information with your child's family?

If you have strong feeling about these things, work with an agency who you feel
will listen to what you want.

5. Will I get counseling all through my pregnancy, after I sign the papers allowing my child to be adopted, and after my baby is gone?

Yes.

6. Can my baby's father and other people who are important to me join me in
counseling if they want to?

Yes.

7. What kind of financial help can I get?

Maintenance, Housing, Education and Transportation, etc. depending on your
individual situation

8. What kind of medical help will I have?

We will help you arrange pre-natal care.

9. Will I get to know about the people who adopt my baby?

Yes, you will have information on the family, picture and letters if you want
them.

10. May I tell you what I think are important traits for parents to have?

Yes.

11. May I meet them if I want?

Yes.

12. Will I ever by able to have contact with them or my child?

Yes, you are entitled to developmental information and pictures through the
agency during the first year and beyond if requested.

13. What information will you provide to the adoptive parents about my family
and me?

Social and medical background information and whatever you want them to know.

The agency social worker will ask you questions to find out some information
about you and the baby's father, such as your medical histories, age, race,
physical characteristics, whether you smoked cigarettes, took any drugs, drank
alcohol since you became pregnant. The social worker asks these questions so
that the baby can be placed with parents who will be fully able to care for and
love the baby, not so that she can turn you down!

Adoption Advocates, Inc. looks forward to working with you and making a
successful adoption plan for you and you child.